This Weekend...

We have had a busy week. K's Brother got married- we are so excited for him and his new bride. I have always felt like family is so important, so I am glad to have another sister, especially one that I like. (I have been lucky with K's family, there are so many horror stories about the in-laws that I was really nervous about how it would work when we got married, but they are really great.) We decided to take family photos on the same day, so I needed to find coordinating outfits. I ended up making skirts for T and I from an old floor-length skirt that I wore to a friend's wedding many years ago. It felt good to finally do something with that skirt, it is one of those things I had been hanging on to and not doing anything with.

We also had my family over for dinner on Sunday. Mmmm fajitas! It wasn't true Tex-Mex, but it was decent. My brother has an amazing tomatillo salsa that is KILLER!!! I like to have people over, it forces me to take care of all the little messes I have been ignoring. (And I can't believe how fast my nieces and nephews are growing!)

So lots of my favorite things going on, eating and hanging out. Here are a few pics from the wedding dinner and reception.

What?

Kisses!

Aren't they cute?

MomLog: These are a few of T's favorite things

Yodeling

Daddy's Hands

Playing with the remote

Realizing that she controls the universe with the remote (Excellent!)

Splashing in the water (I wanna go to Hawaii!!!)

Sleepy Time

How lucky can you get? II

My nostalgia level has been in overdrive lately.

My parents have started the moving process from Texas to Utah. They built a home on the lot where my grandma's home used to be in Salt Lake. A fresh start in familiar territory. My parents are now selling their home in Texas. My parents were originally going to keep it, so I wasn't mentally prepared, and the news brings up so many emotions- I spent Jr. High, High School and some College living there. I am sad that a vital part of what has shaped me is changing.

S was sweet and went to Houston to help pack, and in the process put together some boxes of my things that I had long forgotten about.

Initially, I was just tossing stuff, but I began to read some of the papers I had
collected. Besides the obligatory P.E. and Science awards, did you know that I was given an award for "Most Ladylike" when I was in the 5th grade? (I KNOW!) And I can't tell if the large amount of "Perfect Attendance" awards is good or sad because I secretly wish I had skipped a little more school (to do what, I don't know, but it seems like something kids should do once in awhile). I have also written some fairly depressing poems in my day along with some spectacular essays on important topics like Candy and Aliens.

My favorite though has been some random notes written to me from friends in Jr. High and High School. All the notes were written to me, so I don't know what I had written before or after- or that I want to know, but reading those carefully folded pieces of paper bubbled up what the teenage Z felt. The heartache, secret crushes, loneliness, silliness, fear of not being liked or loved, hoping you really are, anger, giddy joy, wondering if you are good enough, being bored by your life, wishing you had the answers, pretending like you do. Oh yah, I remember feeling that way.

I like to think that time and maturity has taken me further away from the girl I was, struggling with all those emotions. But the truth is, they still hang around. As surrounded by so many wonderful people as I am, I occasionally still wonder, get lonely, feel lost. (Hello insecurity, my old friend. You've come to pester me again.)

So what does this have to do with luck? It has put in my path people that were (and are) nice enough to let me know them, hang out with them, and be a part of their lives.

My luck was to grow in borrowed light until I found some of my own. To do so still.

To all of you, thank you for sharing who you are with me. I am better because of you.

Really, truly, thanks.




Oh, and stay cool.

How lucky can you get?

Little T has been sick. Heartbreaking, inconsolable, crying all night kind of sick. Sleeping only in Mom's arms, in a certain position, for a small amount of time type of sick.

I know I take my health for granted, and it is always shocking to me how disabled I feel when an illness comes around. Now, there is an extra level of intensity for me when it comes to my little one. I cannot imagine how it feels for her, especially to be new in the world and unable to communicate what you need.

But I come out of these last few days with a deeper love for life and all I have been blessed with, especially T. As hard at these days are, I cannot take what I have for granted and get upset. I guess I feel lucky that she turns to me for comfort. That I get to be there when things are bad... and good. That I get to be her mom.

There is something euphoric about it.

T has also hit some fun milestones recently. On Wednesday she decided to get serious about rolling and kept going front to back to front to back, over and over. She seems to only want to hang a Louie though, so she doesn't get far. She is also pulling herself up holding my hands, trying to sit up on her own, and "Dada" suddenly became part of her vocabulary. Oh, and she decided to clap. Hooray!